welcome to shrek.org

a website by aled m

the one and only website for everything shrek!*

*it definitely isn't

what is shrek

baby don't hurt me don't hurt me no more

shrek is a green ogre who lives in a swamp. he is very protective of his swamp and his humble home in the middle of said swamp, hence him often shouting to intruders GET OUT OF MY SWAMP. he speaks with a scottish accent which is pretty cool. shrek is a very good person and went on a whole mission to save his wifey. he probably also slapped lord farquaad. in this respect he is like will smith.

why is shrek cool?

there are many reasons why shrek is cool. here are some:

• he can speak spanish (in the spanish dub)
• he can wrestle really well
• he is green
• he has bad hygeines but we can forgive that

who is shrek's arch nemesis

lord farquaad

who is lord farquaad

lord farquaad is a tiny little man who is 2'4 with weird hair who bullied the gingerbread man. one day he deided that he wanted to have a kingdom and be a king/prince thing so he spoke to his magic mirror who told him to marry a princess. he found a princess called fiona who was locked in a castle but he couldn't be bothered to get her himself so he asked for volunteers to get her and then shrek came cruising in and smashed his henchmen in wrestling so farquaad made shrek go get fiona. he goes with his annoying donkey friend (who is actually so cool) to rescue her and donkey falls in love with a dragon and fiona is an ogre at night etc etc until they get back and fiona and shrek (who are in love now) have a big fight and fiona goes to marry farquaad. then shrek crashes the wedding kisses fiona fiona is permanently an ogre donkey and the dragon have kids ("dronkeys") and they all live happily ever after except for farquaad who shrek probably slapped like will smith slapped chris rock.

now i will give you some good facts about life

1. shrek is love shrek is life, as is further proved in the other shrek website that was also made by me.
2. sometimes little kids in your sibling's theatre performance just do the worm onstage for no apparent reason and that's okay
3. it is important to watch fireman sam sometimes
4. don't be confused be confused.com
5. never gonna give you up never gonna let you down never gonna run around and desert you never gonna make you cry never gonna say goodbye never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
6. BEANS
7. you are not supposed to eat bugs. i found this out the hard way so you don't have to

i am bored of your facts tell me more about shrek

1. how DARE you be bored of my facts
2. ok

shrek is my favourite ogre, even if he is green, which is not a creative colour. if they existed in the same timeline/universe, i think that shrek and fireman sam would be best friends. shrek likes karate in my opinion. shrek can tell the future and he knows your secret

is shrek a god in your opinion?

absolutely